Women + Jealousy
In lieu of the recent International Women’s Day, I think it’s important to remind everyone how amazing we women are. We are even more amazing when we join forces and uplift one another. It’s not always easy. It is absolutely natural to compare, contrast, compete, and so on, but it makes you feel kind of bad inside. Amirightttt?
As long as there are women, there will be jealousy. The two go together like milk and honey, except milk and honey are wonderful. Jealousy... not so much. There are ways to make it better, though. First you need to figure out the ‘WHY’?
WHY JEALOUSY // HOW TO TURN IT AROUND
We’ve all been jealous and we’ve all had someone who is jealous of us (don’t deny it - I’ve stalked your instas...I know my readers are total babes).
There’s two scenarios:
A) You are Jealous of Someone: Ask yourself why are you jealous? Is it their appearance? Where they are in their timeline? Is it the job they have? Or, the relationship they are in? What makes someone’s life SEEM better? The best thing you can do when you are jealous is to admit it. Admit it, accept it, and then turn it into feelings of admiration.
I’ve actually said to a close friend, “Ah, I do feel jealous of her, but I admire her too, because I wish I could do what she does.” This is a major reason people feel jealous: The feeling of incompetence or feeling behind in some way. What I realized quickly was that I need to do what is right for me on MY time, and stop comparing. So, I'm telling you - You are very much capable of achieving your dreams. Do not be so hard on yourself. We are all better than we think, and we impact people more than we realize.
B) Someone is Jealous of You: This is the tricky part. When someone is jealous of you, they can be flat out MEAN. You can’t just say, “I know you are treating me like this, because you are jealous of me.” You’ll sound like a complete tool. Even if it's true. And they know it’s true. So, then what? Negative emotions just sit there... brewing and brewing.... until eventually, someone blows their top.
All you can do in this case is take the high road, be kind, and keep doing what you’re doing (because clearly you’re doing well)! People consumed in jealousy do not want to see you succeed. They are not happy for you. And that’s their 'ish to deal with. Not yours.
INSPIRE ONE ANOTHER
Take the time to think of what you can learn from the amazing people around you, and surround yourself with them. At the same time, distance yourself from the people who do not wish you well. Look out for yourself, but also look out for others. I'm not writing this as if I have it all figured out - I'm writing this, because I've been learning from these experiences.
And just say to yourself: "I am beautiful. I am competent. I am growing. I am right where I need to be." Don't compare timelines. Don't compare relationships. Just live your life and do what makes you happy.
The light in me LOVES and sees the light in you, my dears.